Cross Walk

It is now October. This year has both simultaneously dragged on and flown by. As I've mentioned a lot already, there has been a lot of changes (both positive and negative) as well as grief; both personally and corporately. I cannot begin to list and explain them all. All I know is that my word for this year (Abide) seems laughable, ironic, and somewhat incompatible with the liminality that I've been experiencing this year. Everything seems very Twilight Zone-ish and the idea of "abiding" and remaining in such a weird in-between state makes me feel like it's harder to stay tethered to reality (because reality seems so much harder to grasp when I don't know how to make sense of or accept it). The last time I felt this disoriented and out-of-place was during the turbulence of 2010 - 2013 when I was getting divorced and having to adjust to a life and identity I didn't recognize.

Thankfully, at the heart of the word "abide", is the fact that it's not about abiding in my circumstances but abiding (remaining) in Christ; and Christ abiding in me. That is an anchor for my soul; the tether of all tethers that keeps me grounded. With a lot of intentional heart-work, I've been able to cope and adjust far better than I did fifteen years ago. Back then, I multiplied my pain by running to all the wrong things and away from Jesus. This time, I've done the opposite and can see the clear difference between how my current and former selves have chosen to endure and grow through changes, hardships, and grief. 

As I was reflecting about all this, I really sat deep in thought about how Jesus told us to deny ourselves and take up our crosses and follow Him. I know that none of us have all the answers to the "whys" of sufferings. Yet, as I absorbed Jesus' words, all the broken pieces seemed to come together like a mosaic; bringing the bigger and more beautiful picture together. 

First, there's the denial of self; the forsaking of our flesh and all of our pride and self-proclaimed wisdom. The decision to do so is an act of humility, admission, and surrender. It's a declaration of dependency on Christ. The choice to follow Jesus is twofold because He told us no one can serve two masters. Christ and the flesh go in two different directions; you can't follow them both. To follow one means to unfollow the other (Romans 8:12-14)

Next, there's the "take up your cross" part. It made me think about how individualized that is. We all have unique burdens and struggles to bear. My cross of suffering is a different one than someone else's. We all have hardships, traumas, losses, and sufferings, but the variances between us all are endlessly unique and nuanced. So, whatever that looks like for each of us, it really is "our cross to bear." We each carry our own, but we do have others believers to lean on and help us (Galatians 6:2-5). Even Jesus had an "inner circle". Peter, James, and John went "further in" with Jesus. Even as Jesus carried his literal cross, He had help from Simon of Cyrene. We don't have to (and shouldn't have to) go it alone. Pastor Roy recently had a great message about this! 

Now, here we are at that final part: "follow me." Follow Him? How? Where? At one point, He told His disciples that where He was going, they couldn't come (John 8:14-24, John 13:33-36). Do you know what's interesting about both of these scriptures? In John 8, He talks about them dying in their sins. In John 13, He urges them to love one another and that while they wouldn't be able to go where He was going now, they would later. His death and resurrection made the way possible for all of us to go where we could not come before! The sin that separated us before would separate us no longer! We will not die in our sins if our faith is in Him! And He knows those who love Him because they obey His commands; loving God and loving others. 

The big picture? Christ said the way to the Father is through Him (John 14:6). It is by grace that we are saved through faith (Ephesians 2:8). He is the Savior; not us or our works. We deny ourselves and admit that we cannot save ourselves and that His way, not ours, is the way we are going to follow (self-denial and surrender). Then, we armor up (Ephesians 6:10-18) and KEEP it on! That helmet of salvation is crucial! It's kind of like the Mandalorian; don't remove your helmet or allow it to be removed by others. Let the assurance of Christ's salvation guard your mind! "This is the way!" Now, use the rest of that armor on this journey to "where you are going". We are heaven bound, but we are not there yet. Until then, keep the breastplate of His righteousness on and your shield of faith up. Use it to deflect the fiery arrows of the enemy and strike down lies with the sword of the Spirit (Word of God). Keep the truth buckled around you and your feet always ready to walk in the Gospel of peace (and sharing it with others). Don't forget, we NEED others to share the Gospel with us as much as we do with them; we have nothing covering our backs aside from each other! 

The battle doesn't end until we take our last breath. We just have to keep fighting the good fight (1 Timothy 6:12). I know it's hard to carry that cross every day, but don't forget that it's HIS way that we are following! His yoke is easy and His burden is light; He will TEACH us (Matthew 11:28-30). We can cast our cares on Him because He cares for us (Psalm 55:22, 1 Peter 5:7). In THIS world, we WILL have trouble, but we can take heart because HE has overcome the world (John 16:33). Christ's own journey to the cross was no cakewalk either; why would ours be? From His birth to death, His life wasn't exempt from suffering. Think about all the hardship and chaos surrounding His conception, birth; and having to flee to Egypt afterwards. Think about all the persecution from the Pharisees and others which led to his arrest, torture, and execution. Even as He preached the Gospel and healed people, He didn't have a permanent place to rest His head. Our King never made His home in a palace or lived a life of creature comforts. He was born in a manager, slept wherever they were welcomed as they traveled, and was buried in a borrowed grave after suffering an excruciating and undeserved death on our behalf. 

Whatever burdens are nailed on our personal crosses that we carry have already been borne by our Savior. There's nothing He doesn't understand. He already suffered it all for us. Whatever we go through is to build our character and continue the journey of self-denial, picking up our cross, and following Him: 

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. - Romans 5:3-5

Over the years, it's become apparent to me that it's far too easy to say "why me" out of self-pity instead of "why me" out of curiosity. When wallowing gets chosen over worshiping, I'm making myself the focus instead of Him. I have learned that where I fix my gaze MATTERS more than anything! Whatever/whomever is the focal point, that's who is being followed. If I follow my own flesh, I'll go in circles and spiral out-of-control. When I fix my gaze on Him, He shows me the way out and keeps my feet on the right path. I remind myself to stay curious and pursue the "whys" in Him. Curiosity and seeking Him leads to the discovery of such wonderful treasures that can't be found in anyone or anything else! He shows me and teaches me the things I need to know. Though, sometimes there are things that seem unfair or don't seem to make sense. However, God told me a long time ago that sometimes I have to be ok with not knowing things. That's a hard one, because like most people, I like to know and have the answers. But, maybe some things are just too much for my finite brain to comprehend from an infinitely good, wise, and perfect God.

I've also come to the realization and acceptance of the fact that the war never stops. It's no wonder we are told to put our armor ON, but we're never told to take it off. It's hard, and I get weary of it. Though, do I really expect to not face hardships and suffering? Where does it say that we ever put our cross down? It may sound bleak to sort of say the suffering never ends, but it's true and not true at the same time. We're assured that no matter what thorn we have in our side, His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:6-9). To some degree, C3PO's lament of suffering being "our lot in life" is true. No one is exempt from it, but
we don't have to worry about it: 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 4:6-7. 

This is how we deal with the suffering of the now until the time where there is no more. The old order of things have not passed away yet. Right now, we have to contend with a "time for everything". It's not ALL suffering any more than it's all pleasure either. Sometimes the cross is heavier and sometimes it feels lighter; but it's always with us and so is He (and so is the church). 

Grace and peace to you, my friends! I'm still here for a reason, and so are you! Life is hard, but God is good; always. Forsake your flesh and surrender! Link arms with Jesus (and others) as you carry your cross, and follow Him all your days. You will get through this. You have crossed over from death into life (John 5:24). God bless you!

Being a Force for Good

Today is the National Day of Prayer. It's also Star Wars Day (may the fourth be with you!). At first, it felt odd and awkward that these two days are sharing the spotlight. After thinking about it, however, I see how it's very fitting.

Every day, we need Jesus more than yesterday. His mercy, grace, joy, and peace are all things that we desperately need; even more than the air we breathe. Without Him, we have no hope...because He IS hope....our "only hope." Ponder these verses from Lamentations 3:22-24:

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,

for his compassions never fail.

 

They are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

 

I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;

therefore I will wait for him.”

Let that sink in. Because of His unfailing love and compassion, we are not consumed. The dark side of this world can't eat us alive or rob us of the victory that was accomplished on the cross. Every new day is a fresh new display of His faithfulness and goodness. He renews and restores our souls and gives us our portion of grace for the day; whatever that daily bread looks like, He provides it like He did the manna for the Israelites.

We live in a time where it's easy to become discouraged and depressed. We look at the sith lords in power and feel like we'll forever be dominated by greed, power, and war. Yes, tyranny and injustice is hard to witness; but we do not have to be consumed by it. The previous verses remind us of where our hope and joy is found and Psalm 23 tells us who takes care of us. The government doesn't have our backs (and probably never will) but the Lord, our Good Shepherd, always does!

If we truly want to see change, we have to go to the source: our hearts. In 2 Chronicles 7:14, the ever popular verse for this day, we see how to do that: 

 

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves 

and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, 

then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

 

Don't just glaze over the words here. There is some HEAVY stuff in it and we won't see change until we're truly putting these commands into practice. We need to HUMBLE ourselves; that means surrendering and laying down our pride. We need to pray; opening our hearts listen and obey as we earnestly seek His face. That means, pursuing Him, knowing Him, and obeying Him and His commands. That's where the next part comes in; turning away from our wicked ways (repentance). Only then can He heal our land when we confess and repent of our sins and ask for forgiveness. It doesn't matter what the government makes legal or illegal. What matters is that WE obey God and repent from our own wickedness. If we SEEK Him in prayer and in His Word, we will KNOW what is right and wrong. We will see things change because people will be living according to God's commands even if they're not the "law of the land."

If there's anything that we can learn from Star Wars, it's that there is always going to be evil and conflict in this fallen world. We should keep fighting the good fight until our dying breath (1 Timothy 6:12, 2 Timothy 4:7). Jesus already gave us the victory and we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13). Keep your armor on (Ephesians 6:10-18) and stay connected with other believers; no one is meant to fight alone! To battle the darkness around us, and within us, remember 1 John 4:4: 

 

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, 

because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.

 

This One that is in you, friends, is the Holy Spirit! He's always with you and never leaves you. He is supreme, sovereign, perfect, and REAL! He's beyond anything "the Force" could ever be....and He's living in YOU! Isn't that amazing?! Or, if you have yet to know Him (and would like to invite Him into your heart) please don't wait any longer! Confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that Jesus is Lord and that God raised Him from the dead. Accept and believe in Him as your Savior and you will be saved (Romans 10:9-10)! Confess your sins to Him; He is faithful and just to forgive you and cleanse you from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). Your name will be recorded in the Book of Life and the Holy Spirit will come to live in your heart right away! He's the deposit guaranteeing what is to come!! You will belong to Jesus and His family! Be sure you contact me (or another strong Christian friend that you know) and tell them about your decision for Christ so that you will have someone to walk with you on your journey and help you take your next steps of faith!

 

Grace and peace to you, my friends! We are a "force" for good in this world when we are living according to the Spirit (Romans 8:3-5). Let's pray hard today, and every day; surrendering ourselves to the will of God as we repent and seek His face! Amen!

 

 

I'm Willing to "Do Something" for Donations!

Have you ever had a moment where you said, "That's it! I've had it!"? Have you ever been so fired up that it moved you to drastic action? Undoubtedly, you have. Who hasn't been riled up about something at some point in their life? It could have been something petty or something truly worth fighting for, but we've all had times where an injustice has compelled us to fight for what's right; and made us feel that we would do whatever it takes, no mater the cost.

That is how I felt today when I read this article by Matt Walsh. Every time I read something of his, I feel like he's writing my own thoughts and feelings. I nod in agreement, share his posts on Facebook and Twitter, and do all I can to keep fighting the good fight.

One of the ways I have been hoping to make a difference is through the annual Walk for Life for my local crisis pregnancy center (Heartline). I have been trying hard to get people to care enough to donate. I thought that the release of those undercover videos (which exposed Planned Parenthood and the abortion industry) would cause people to step up in record numbers to defend life and support CPCs in their communities. Yet, at this moment, I haven't met my minimum fundraising goal and the fundraiser as a whole hasn't even raised 10%....and there are less than 25 days left until the walk!! :(

Like Matt Walsh pointed out in his article, it doesn't seem like much has changed...and I'm blown away by that! HOW can we POSSIBLY live life as usual when there is mass genocide going on in America? Are we REALLY going to continue ignoring this hidden holocaust and scandalous atrocity of murdering children and selling their organs for profit?! Do we really want our legacy to be that of the Nazis??!! C'MON AMERICA!!! Why aren't we jumping at the chance to DO SOMETHING?!

This is why I'm upping the ante. If you need new incentives to help, I'm going to give you some right now! I am willing to make several personal sacrifices based on certain fundraising milestones that I reach. If donating out of the goodness of your heart (or the fact that you can claim your donation as a tax deductible contribution) isn't a good enough reason, I am now committed to doing the following:

• $500 raised - I will go ONE WEEK WITHOUT MAKEUP. Yes, you heard me lol. I can't remember the last time I have done this (if ever). Anyone that knows me knows that I do not go out in public without touching up my face (you'll eventually see why!). On the week that I do this, I will take a picture each of the seven days and share it on my Twitter and other personal social media accounts. I will do this to show my support for uncovering and sharing the real and raw truth about the ugliness and horror of abortion. You can't sugarcoat or glamorize it, folks. I'm sure there will be some that will ask me "why do you look so tired?" or "why aren't you wearing makeup today?" and maybe even "you look so old!" etc....and I will tell them why. I will also be sure to share about it on this blog as well! 

• $1,500 raised - I will post a video on my blog (and/or social media) where I draw from a list of names of those who have donated. The winner will receive a free Piyo exercise program (the base kit) from me and a free computer cleaning/tune-up from my husband (references are available regarding his work; he can also tune up your computer remotely if you don't live around here). Chris and I have our regular "day jobs" but we still find time to work these other jobs that we love. Essentially, we both like to keep "machines" running. Just like a computer, if you keep your body strengthened and running efficiently, you will be more likely to function at peak performance. Finely tuned machines work best! An energized body and optimum technology are two things that most people depend on to get through the day so we would like to use our time and talents to help with that! *NOTE* This is limited to United States residents only. The funding page only shows me the name, date, and amount given so if you want to be a part of this giveaway, please email me that you've given (especially if you elected to be displayed as anonymous or if I don't already know you personally). If I don't know who you are, I can't draw your name and contact you for shipping information if you win lol. Additionally, my husband's computer work is only for an in-person or remote cleaning/tune-up. If you need additional extensive/heavy-duty work, computer parts, etc.,you'll have to discuss fees with him.

• $2,500 raised - I will draw an additional name from the list of people who have donated and the winner will receive a bag of Shakeology (vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, greenberry, vegan chocolate, and vegan tropical strawberry are the flavors available). Chris will also offer a free computer cleaning/tune-up. *NOTE* Same terms also apply here as previously outlined in the first giveaway.

•  $5,000 raised - I WILL SHAVE MY HEAD!! Yes, you read that correctly!! Again, anyone that knows me knows that I value my hair (and look awful with short hair) so this is a BIG DEAL for me to commit to! The way I see it, my hair will come back; but lives lost do not. This will be a great opportunity for me to not only "die to self" but to sacrifice for a good cause and share about defending life when I get asked all kinds of questions. I know that the first assumption will likely have to do with cancer; which is also a cause that is near and dear to my heart. My grandma conquered breast cancer, but didn't win the battle with the skin cancer that she fought later on. My great-aunt, other relatives, and many brave friends have also dealt with this horrible disease; and several are still fighting or have passed away. I hate cancer about as equally as I hate abortion. Both are ruthless, senseless, life-sucking killers that claim countless lives and shatter families.  If my hair weren't color treated, I would donate my hair as well. I want those whose lives have been touched by cancer to know that this will be in honor of YOU too! When I reach this goal, I'm sure my empathy, grief, and prayers for all those who have suffered (past and present) will only multiply. Not a day goes by that I don't miss my Grandma and strive to fight off tears (I'm crying even as I type). However, I am willing to take on any extra empathy and grief if it means that I've raised awareness (as well as funds) to save and sustain the precious lives of babies, women, and families! 

Whew! I'm both nervous and excited! I'm more determined and pumped for this walk than ever! I really hope this post will motivate people to donate and even PARTICIPATE with me! ;) By the way, I decided what my costume is going to be when I walk (yes, costume! It's a "superhero for babies" theme and dressing up is a fun option that I'm excited to take part in as well!). I am going to be R2D2. Why? Because Star Wars is awesome....duh! ;) Actually, it's more than that. R2D2 is resilient and never gives up! He overcomes every obstacle (including discouragement from C3P0) to fulfill every life-saving mission he takes on. He proves that one person (or droid lol) can make ALL THE DIFFERENCE! NEVER underestimate your purpose in this world! God uniquely created you with a special role to play! Don't give up or let anyone or anything thwart you; even if you get knocked down or things blow up in your face. 

Grace and peace to you, my friends! As I wrap up this post, I want to share with you the video of a song that I heard the other day. I was incredibly encouraged, empowered, and inspired! It's called, "Do Something" by Matthew West. I challenge you to watch and listen to this! It is a heart pounding, fist pumping, inspiring call to action that will remind you that all things are possible! It's quite the anthem! May it inspire YOU to do whatever "something" God lays on your heart. Hopefully, one of those "somethings" will be to donate a dollar or more to reaching my goal for Heartline because it's MY something....as well as OUR something, and HIS something! If life doesn't mean "something" to us, then nothing truly matters at all. FIGHT FOR LIFE! Donate "something" and feel free to share this blog! God bless you!